My Facebook Me
I dawned on me the other day what is so appealing about Facebook.
In fact, Facebook has gone through an evolution of appeal. In its early days, it was likely just the fact that not everybody could "join" that made it so desirable. You had to have a degree from one of a limited number of colleges and universities in order to qualify, and then you had to be part of a particular age group. Smartly, Zuckerberg built exclusivity into membership.
Eventually, of course, Facebook opened its virtual doors to everyone, though wisely maintaining a certain style that kept it from the trashiness that eventually trashed MySpace (not to mention the semi-nude photos of your teenage daughter, but the less said about that the better!).
Soon, having a presence on Facebook was de rigueur if you wanted to demonstrate that you were au courant (is that too many foreign phrases in a single sentence?), and while LinkedIn holds pride of place as the site to display to show you're a serious - and with it - worker, Facebook activity still aces Foursquare, Spotify, and even Pinterest when it comes to Social Media must-dos.
Yes, it's fun to exchange messages and updates with friends and family, share photos and news.
But - and I'm sure I'm neither the first nor the only person to figure this out - what makes Facebook such a signal success, it seems to me, is that it's your chance to invent the you you want to be.
Facebook is all about presentation, and if you don't know that, you aren't using it correctly. It's also the case that many people have found that out, much to their chagrin, when a boss or a potential boss checked out their Facebook presence and found them sharing less-than-savory stories, politically charged commentaries, screw-the-office remarks, or drunk photos which seemed hilarious when they posted them.
Wise Facebookers realized a long time ago that what they said and did in this space could not only satisfy an internal need to reinvent themselves, but could offer to the world a kinder, gentler, smarter, nobler, not to mention better-looking version of themselves to the world. Have you ever seen a really bad photo of someone on Facebook? I rest my case.
The whole thing hit me one day as I read the seven-hundreth political post from one friend who has decided opinions in that realm. I wondered, for the seven-hundreth time, why he didn't realize that not everyone shared his vehement views, and that he could be turning off a large number of friends, not to mention potential business contacts and/or employers with what can only be described as demeaning and small-minded snipes at the other end of the political spectrum.
And then I started looking around at the posts other friends habitually make, and wondered what it told me about the person this person wanted to be (or was inadvertently presenting to the world without considering the fallout):
- There's a guy who posts philosophical, deep poster-type images with accompanying personal insights, but who is, in reality, a notorious serial cheater
- The woman who airs dirty laundry and posts personal messages on walls, rather than as private messages, all with a "who, me?" attitude
- The many stalkers who haunt ex-boyfriend's or girlfriend's pages - when said boyfriend or girlfriend haven't figured out how to make information private, or who seem to know the instant the object of their obsession has logged on by instant messaging them within seconds
- The women, and yes, some men, who post Playboy-style photos of themselves, inviting you to "subscribe" to their pages
- The people who just can't avoid making snarky comments on whatever someone else takes the time and energy to share
- And who are these people who are on Facebook so much they can't possibly be doing anything else productive all day? Or do they simply want to be seen as having an interesting life and therefore having lots and lots and lots to post?
Of course, there are many people who post what interests them, share songs and stories and family photos and other things they feel their friends and family might enjoy. I suppose all of this is just trying to "be" whom you want to be, and may very well be in reality, as well - a happy, friendly, well-rounded individual who has interests and a sense of humor and a life.
In fact, Facebook has gone through an evolution of appeal. In its early days, it was likely just the fact that not everybody could "join" that made it so desirable. You had to have a degree from one of a limited number of colleges and universities in order to qualify, and then you had to be part of a particular age group. Smartly, Zuckerberg built exclusivity into membership.
Eventually, of course, Facebook opened its virtual doors to everyone, though wisely maintaining a certain style that kept it from the trashiness that eventually trashed MySpace (not to mention the semi-nude photos of your teenage daughter, but the less said about that the better!).
Soon, having a presence on Facebook was de rigueur if you wanted to demonstrate that you were au courant (is that too many foreign phrases in a single sentence?), and while LinkedIn holds pride of place as the site to display to show you're a serious - and with it - worker, Facebook activity still aces Foursquare, Spotify, and even Pinterest when it comes to Social Media must-dos.
Yes, it's fun to exchange messages and updates with friends and family, share photos and news.
But - and I'm sure I'm neither the first nor the only person to figure this out - what makes Facebook such a signal success, it seems to me, is that it's your chance to invent the you you want to be.
Facebook is all about presentation, and if you don't know that, you aren't using it correctly. It's also the case that many people have found that out, much to their chagrin, when a boss or a potential boss checked out their Facebook presence and found them sharing less-than-savory stories, politically charged commentaries, screw-the-office remarks, or drunk photos which seemed hilarious when they posted them.
Wise Facebookers realized a long time ago that what they said and did in this space could not only satisfy an internal need to reinvent themselves, but could offer to the world a kinder, gentler, smarter, nobler, not to mention better-looking version of themselves to the world. Have you ever seen a really bad photo of someone on Facebook? I rest my case.
The whole thing hit me one day as I read the seven-hundreth political post from one friend who has decided opinions in that realm. I wondered, for the seven-hundreth time, why he didn't realize that not everyone shared his vehement views, and that he could be turning off a large number of friends, not to mention potential business contacts and/or employers with what can only be described as demeaning and small-minded snipes at the other end of the political spectrum.
And then I started looking around at the posts other friends habitually make, and wondered what it told me about the person this person wanted to be (or was inadvertently presenting to the world without considering the fallout):
- There's a guy who posts philosophical, deep poster-type images with accompanying personal insights, but who is, in reality, a notorious serial cheater
- The woman who airs dirty laundry and posts personal messages on walls, rather than as private messages, all with a "who, me?" attitude
- The many stalkers who haunt ex-boyfriend's or girlfriend's pages - when said boyfriend or girlfriend haven't figured out how to make information private, or who seem to know the instant the object of their obsession has logged on by instant messaging them within seconds
- The women, and yes, some men, who post Playboy-style photos of themselves, inviting you to "subscribe" to their pages
- The people who just can't avoid making snarky comments on whatever someone else takes the time and energy to share
- And who are these people who are on Facebook so much they can't possibly be doing anything else productive all day? Or do they simply want to be seen as having an interesting life and therefore having lots and lots and lots to post?
Of course, there are many people who post what interests them, share songs and stories and family photos and other things they feel their friends and family might enjoy. I suppose all of this is just trying to "be" whom you want to be, and may very well be in reality, as well - a happy, friendly, well-rounded individual who has interests and a sense of humor and a life.
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